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2001-09-03 - 10:05 p.m.

what's with these bears?

we've got to do something about these bears! i was just playin my favorite game today which is "earth spectator" where me and paul and whoever else wants to come (except peter we don't let him come because he's just a tattletale -- I remember when paul and I were dropping shaving cream filled waterballoons on queen elizabeth and peter told dad and boy were we in trouble i wasn't allowed to leave my cloud for about a month and dad made me pick a switch and let me tell you if you think it's tough to find a easy-on-your-rump switch down there you should see it up here we have ONE switch tree and every branch is a whopper) i just realized how long that was oh well! anyway so paul and I were checkin out whats goin on down there and there was this big ass bear just making life hard for a few poor campers they all had a few sticks and all that but the bear didn't care at all it wanted their cooler or something so paul and i decided to help them out a little bit and we sent a big st. bernard. but that didn't turn out to be the best idea because we remembered that st. bernards are for saving lost skiiers not hikers being molested by bears the dog didn't do much it sat and stared at the bear for a while and then just sorta wandered off. so then we decided to send in a bunch of rodeo clowns with air horns and that sorta did the trick the bear didn't know what to think and left those hunters alone so paul and I gave each other a big high five and went back to work before dad caught us loafing. It's not like we can be fired or anything (some things are just like they are on earth! I'd like to see any of those kennedy brats get fired) but he sure can make life hard for us if he catches us. haha good thing he never reads this or else i'd be on cleaning crew for a week.

anyway i should talk to dad about these bears at least we could try to make them less hungry or something because they sure do make life hard for a lot of campers just trying to have a little fun without worrying about some fat jackass animal rooting through their coolers looking for ritz crackers.

well not much else going on up here lately its been sorta boring even after we thought we'd have a big influx of people over labor drunk weekend so good work you all! there was this one guy though who got really drunk and built a submarine -- oh we all had a great laugh about that one!

pax jesus

aim: iamrealjesus

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