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2002-12-07 - 9:42 p.m.


so it is that time of year again when all of you people down there go totally insane and give each other stuff in my name which i will admit always makes me feel a little weird! I mean think about it its the biggest shopping season in all the world and no one sends a little sugar my way!! if each one of you would just send me one thing to put under MY tree it would make my birthday something to write home to mama about! BUT NO!! every year I get the same old stuff from the same old people take last year for instance:

DAD: socks

Paul: a rusty old pepsi sign ( and he knows that jesus is a COKE MAN not a dumb old pepsi jerk)

Peter: a lump of coal from that son of a bitch and he was DRUNK the entire time and kept calling me Jeff I mean seriously who the heck is jeff??

Dubyah: an awesome toy train with a whistle that went TOOOT TOOOOT (he is my only best good friend)

and that is about IT so when you are all havin a hoot whoopin it up for MY DAMN BIRTHDAY why dont you fedex some of that hoot up here my address is:


1 Golden Road

heaven, heaven, 81209-1230

thanks so much

aim: iamrealjesus

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